Colonia Jesus

Oh No! There Goes My Mojo

So another seriously fucked up week in the Galaxy, Seems that some people just cannot get shit right. As a result, I have lost the urge to do anything. Maybe I spent too long in shooters on Saturday night or that Onionhead Phisto sold me was seriously bad, but I don’t have my usual spark. Still I have my flock to look after and there has been an influx of new Cmdrs to the area lately. I always offer to put them up in my establishment, few turn me down when i trell them of the specials we have opn offer. "BUY 3 Drinks and pay for a 4th" and "outdrink the girl and get a free night of passion for 800 Arx" they seem to be very popular.





Seems that the Limpdicks (CL76) have stolen the plans for the Romulans cloaking device as none have seen open play for the last week. Those that did bought a one-way ticket to the plot outside the back of my house. They lost the war in Carcosa and seem to be slipping back everywhere else, except that is for the system they cannot lose (great idea Colonia Cockwads take residence in a protected system and claim to be the saviours of the region). It has also come to light that they resorted to griefing to try to get their own way. “Join us to defeat the griefers or we will grief you?” Seems the Anarchists and supporters are tearing CL76 a new arsehole (I am sure they can find a use for another arsehole as they have plenty of them)



You may remember that last week FDev fucked the whole galaxy over with their firmware update, they really are a bunch of thundercunts to be honest. Now they stole a load of money from honest murderhobos and fucked them right over. “Buy this Fertiliser and take advantage of the great introductory price. “and when people do they steal their money, who cares if they were making 2 billion credits per hour? I mean after the shit they turned out in that last update they should be on bended knees grovelling for people to stay. But no they took ships and credits, except they took way too much, they still owe me around 200 million, even Phisto could learn a trick or two from these shitting bandits.




Hmm I bumped into an old acquaintance this week in Colonia. Breno Zed you crettinous turd, so you’re looking for me?? If you were not such a cowardly piece of crap and stuck around you might achieve something. But no, you combat log or run away.



Come back another day fuckflaps.


My old mate Sanchez though has brightened up my week he continues his crusade in the Badlands of Sothis and Ceos, He now bestows free Arx on his victims, this I find very charitable, not only does he speed them to the station he pays them for allowing him to do it. Sadly for me my Murder Mojo died this week. The culminations of FDev the limpdicks and dirty little cheating shits like Breno have all but beaten any interest out of me. Cannot even be arsed to fly my new ride. I am sure that if you all donate generously though that my normal zeal will return.





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